I’m Back! Did You Know I Play Chess?

Why do I mention this? I found the following image at John Cox Art:

There is a good bit of truth to that, but I want to focus on is the fact that it’s a French proverb?! I thought that playing chess required the ability not to scream out “I surrender!” every time the opposing queen twitches.

Anyway, the semester’s over and I plan to gradually return to blogging. “Gradually?” you ask? “But won’t you be back in school in a few weeks?” Actually, sort of. I’m going to be taking only two classes. They’ll both be distance education, one will be Spanish (i.e. easy) and the other will be a repeat class (I took credit-only this semester). So, my courseload won’t exactly be demanding. I’ll also be working twenty hours a week, but I was already doing that.

And I Have a College Education in English

I’m attempting to create the longest Christian/conservative run-on sentence. Any help would be appreciated. Note that all the terms are translated into Leftese. (i.e. I don’t actually think of the GOP as Rethuglicans) Just to be on the safe side, check below to see what I actually mean by certain things

I’m the Sky Fairy-fearing, Bible-thumping, Zombie-following, trigger happy, Rethuglican-voting, torture-loving, planning-hating, immigrant-hunting, science-ignoring, healthcare-paying, carbon-footprinting, Cheney-loving, antique-obsessed, 9/11-harping, gas-guzzling, angrily-mobbing, tea-partying, Rush-worshipping, Palin-supporting, backwards, redneck, hillbilly, bitterly clinging, right-wing extremist your Department of Homeland Security warned you about.

“Zombie-following” – I follow Jesus

“torture-loving” – I support waterboarding

“planning-hating” – I oppose abortion

“immigrant-hunting” – I oppose illegal immigration

“science-ignoring” – I oppose evolution based both on my faith and on scientific “study” (ditto for “climate change”)

“healthcare-paying” – I pay for my healthcare

“antique-obsessed” – I support the Constitution

“Rush-worshipping” – I listen to Rush

WARNING! Head Inflating to Ten Times Normal Size

If you look at my (original) Wanda Sykes transcript, there’s a comment from James Grisham. Who is James Grisham? As you may be able to tell from the comment, he is the producer of the Sean Hannity Show. I should warn you, my ego is growing in leaps and bounds at the moment.

Who’s awesome? I’m awesome. Bow before me, anonymous masses!

T-Shirt Store

I’ve just set up a store where I’ll be selling T-Shirts, buttons, and such over at spreadshirt.com. It might also have some programming-related stuff. Visit it!

New Blog! – Programming 4 Practice

I just started a second blog, because I decided I was going to start doing some serious programming and need a website to organize everything. Figured I might as well use WordPress. If your interested in programming OR if you just like to play games (which some of my programs will be), check it out.

YouTube Channel

I’ve just finished setting up the YouTube channel for this blog.  It’s not complete yet, but I hope to get pretty much every YouTube video that I link to on this channel (mainly so I have control so URLs don’t move).  You can also find subscriptions to subscribe to like MachoSauceProductions, Steven Crowder, and HowTheWorldWork.

GuffyConservative’s SCAAC on YouTube.

The Bible

As I’ve stated before, I’m a Christian. Now, let me explain a little more specifically than that. By Christian, I mean Christ is not only my savior but also my LORD (and everything that implies). I go to a nondenominational church here in North Carolina. Our sister churches developed from a split between several Christians with the mainline Church of Christ.

Now I could go on about doctrine and such, but what it boils down to is that we do what the Bible says. Period. We have some differences of opinion about what, exactly, it says; but we’re all clear on that which the bible is clear. For example, cursing is sin. Also, lust and extramarital sex are sin. And so on and so forth. Now, since I’ll be referencing the Bible on occasion, I figure I’ll make a category of pages that are the Bible itself over the course of time. I’ll be using the NIV (not that others are bad, it’s just the one I know). The complete NIV (and many other versions) are available at biblegateway.com. The Zondervan people can sue me if they want, but I don’t believe they should have copyright rights, since they didn’t write the Bible.

Hello World! My Name is Andrew.

I’m sorry, but I had to do the “Hello World!” thing, I’m a computer science major. Now just a bit about me and what this blog will be about.

I’m an avid reader of IMAO and occassional reader of Treacher and others and figured I’d start my own. I also watch Zo (through IMAO) and Crowder (through YouTube). Obviously, I’m a rightwing extremist, as stated by a recent Department of Homeland Security report, since, as a conservative, I hate abortion. And that, my friends, is what this blog will be about. Conservatism…not abortion…

Now, unlike IMAO and Treacher, this blog will focus a bit more on the issues and news and a bit less on the humor. Why? Frankly, because I’m not that funny and I’ll leave that up to the professionals. But I like to think I’m funny. I’ll try to make jokes along the way. If they’re bad, let me know, so I can look like an even bigger idiot when I ignore you.

Another thing is that, unlike atheist conservative Harvey, I am a Christian. I hope to have a second blog, or second category, or something for that because, as you will see, they’ll often separate in topic. But there will be much overflow, so maybe I’ll abandon that whole idea. I’m so decisive, it hurts.

Now, as a Christian, I have a few requests to make of anyone who comments on my blog.

Don’t use foul language. By that, I mean that anything that counts as “unwholesome talk.” Avoid any profanity or misuse of God’s or Jesus’ names or titles. And while insults to me and to others will happen, please try to practice restraint.

I WILL DELETE/CENSOR POSTS WITH PROFANITY OR MISUSE OF ONE OF THE TRINITY’S NAME OR TITLE. Other than that, I will merely request courtesy to everyone.

Let me clarify the whole “misuse” thing real quick. If you say “Thank God…” that’s OK by me. But if you say something like “Jesus!” (as in an exclamation like “Darn!”) that will not be tolerated. I’ll delete the post (and nothing more).

Let’s see… That’s pretty much it. I’ll tell ya’ll a bit about myself and then move on to the first real post.

I’m a student at North Carolina State University – College of Engineering. I’m majoring in Computer Science and minoring in Spanish (to my fellow haters of illegal immigration and such; I’m just learning Spanish because I want to – not because I think people should). I currently work in a fast-food joint near campus. You gottaneedagettawanna have their chicken fried. I LOVE country music/southern rock. I don’t really hate any kind of music (I even have a rap song or two – and by that, I mean two). But I can’t stand the women-degrading, drug-promoting, or sex-promoting stuff.

My background in politics/religion. My parents are both hardline conservative Christians (but I don’t take what they say on faith, generally, as per the parable of the soils, I have my own roots). My dad and I talk both a lot and agree VERY closely on pretty much everything. He’s a carpenter/private construction contractor, which I love. Because, when he gets into debates with preachers/ministers and they ask what he does, he gets to say “I’m just a humble carpenter.” It’d be totally awesome if we were Jewish (“race”, not religion). My mom’s a self-employed accountant for a few local businesses. I’m the oldest of four children. My brother, adopted from India, is a year and a half younger than me. My sister is three weeks younger than him. I swear, she was not born, but cloned from my mother. My other sister is a year and a half younger than her…putting our birthdays only two days apart…which I hate. We live in rural suburbs, raise chickens, and have a garden. Before we moved here, we lived on the grounds of the church “R” Camp in Culpeper, Virginia, where my dad was the caretaker/constructiony-person and my mom was the administrator. So, I’m from the country and I like it that way. The town had two stop signs, no stop lights, one mom ‘n pop store and no four-way intersections.

One last thing. I’ll link to tons of songs, websites, articles and such, but do not necessarily agree with them all on everything. For example, I don’t agree with the cursing in the IMAO posts, but they still make good points…and are usually rather funny, too (but only if you’re not a Kool-Aid Drinkin’ liberal hippie).